I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
