She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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