i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Randomize
