no, he came in my armpit
never play flip cup with pint glasses
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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