Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm sobbing to NWA
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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