Can Purell be used as lube?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
