I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Randomize
