What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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