WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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