ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Michael Bay diarrhea
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
