So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
