i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
