just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize