What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Randomize
