she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
