i think my tv is drunk
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Church boner. Awkwardddd
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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