meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
