I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
