there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize