please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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