no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
