Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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