please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
