i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
