i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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