got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
