So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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