Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
