Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
