I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
