he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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