she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
