Need sex. Gaining weight.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
