Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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