Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
