Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
