guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
only you would photoshop your dick
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize
