Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
