looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
She's the barista slut.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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