butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
