apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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