just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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