Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
And then my night got REAL pukey
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
