you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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