Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
