I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
