Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
too bad you live with your parents still
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
