She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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