I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
In America we eat man semen.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
