Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
